Unsung Japanese Foods

tsukemonoWe've all heard of sushi, sashimi, tenpura, ramen, the fairly rare teriyaki. and "sake" even if we can't technically identify those foods or tell them apart, but sushi and sashimi are not so popular in the thousands of Japanese towns and cities cut off from the sea and fresh ingredients by mountain ranges (and their American versions seriously suck), tenpura is based on food imported from the Dutch during the Edo Period, ramen is Chinese, and sort of like Japanese fast food.  The word "sake" in Japanese just means "alcohol", so when foreigners talk about "sake", many Japanese think they're talking about beer or wine or moonshine.  I'd like to discuss five of my favorite unsung Japanese foods, which maybe haven't caught on in the West because they're difficult to pronounce.

(1) hiyashichuuka - hiyashichuuka is technically Chinese food ("chuuka" means Chinese food".), but I don't know anything about China, and foods take on a totally new dimension when imported to another culture (like the ridiculously overpriced poster food for conspicuous consumption sushi in the U.S.)  Hiyashichuuka is especially great when it's a thousand degrees outside like it is now.  I want to eat it everyday in summer.  The typical hiyashichuuka - although there are many varieties - consists of cold ramen noodles placed in a bowl.  Typically cucumber, moyashi (I don't know what the fuck it's called in English, but it's kind of bean-sproutish.), and tamagoyaki (sweet, scrambled egg, but that description sounds retarded.) are sliced thin and placed on top.  Often other ingredients, such as grilled chicken, benishouga (pickled ginger), squid, or octopus, are added for variety.  The dish is topped with an ample amount of black, Japanese rice (or apple, or pomegranate) vinegar, called "su", and/or goma (sesame) dressing.  In summer, I want to eat this at least once a day.  Mix to desired degree before consuming. 

(2) omuraisu - The word "omuraisu" is a bastardization of the English words "omelette" and "rice", and like many Japanese importations, there is a huge, apparent language barrier that stands contra masterful application.  Omuraisu consists of a mound of rice - often mixed with various meats and vegetables and held together by ketchup, a Chinese invention by the way - topped with a shockingly thin and plastic layer of omelette.  I've tried to make it many times and failed.  I still cant believe how thin the egg is.  This igloo of egg and dirty rice is then topped with some sort of sauce, usually "white sauce", which former and current Bojangles customers - but not people from the Northeast - would be familiar with, or "brown sauce", which usually resembles a thicker version of beef stew broth, sometimes with the beef included, and sometimes nashi.  Mix to desired degree before consuming.    

(3) donburi - I've thought about opening a Japanese restaurant in the U.S. after I get back there.  If I did, I would specialize in donburi, and call it "Don Doko Don" which roughly translates as the sound of a taiko being struck.  The word "donburi" is often translated as "rice bowl", but this sounds a bit antiseptic to Western ears.  The dish consists of rice in a bowl, with shit put on top.  It may be the most basic Japanese food, but that doesn't mean there isn't any variety.  The donburi category encompasses tamagodon, which is just egg and rice; oyakodon, which is chicken, egg, and rice, and translates as "parent-child bowl" - very witty, and, my favorite, "tako raisu", which consists of cheese, ground beef, chili powder, beans, and vegetables on top of rice.  It's amazing.

(4) tsukemono - tsukemono is often translated as "pickles", but this food is generally at the opposite end of the elegance spectrum from the accoutrement of Le Big Mac.  Famous in the cradles of Japanese civilization, Kyoto and Kamakura respectively, tsukemono has a tremendous amount of variety; the flavor is almost always more subtle and lighter than that shit that's advertised by that annoying pelican. In April, I journeyed to Kamakura, and stepped into a tiny shop on the busy main street (down a ways from where they sell shuriken) specializing in tsukemono.  There were hundreds of varieties which could be tasted, and I decided to have a sample-a-thon, literally consuming hundreds of varieties of pickled fruits, vegetables, and even pickled raw whole fish (which was probably the best).  At the end of the sample-a-thon, I decided to purchase five varieties, which I gradually consumed as snacks and gave to clients as "omiyage" over the nest several months.  It's July now, and I still have some ginger at my house, which I'm waiting to use for something, because, as George Constanza says, "Who eats ginger!?"  

(5) senbei - Another food famous in Kamakura, the word "senbei" is usually translated as "rice cake", but this makes no sense, since we already have "rice cakes" which taste like shit.  It would be like Kobe beef trying to market itself as "Double Quarter Pounder".  And plus, senbei are usually hard, more like crackers, but we also already have "rice crackers", so let's just call them "senbei".  Senbei, like all the other foods here, have tremendous variety, and are largely eaten as snacks, like tsukemono.  There are spicy, salty, and sweet varieties.  As I write this, there is a huge, unopened bag of senbei coated in honey sitting next to me.  The best part about senbei (and tsukemono as well) is that you can literally sit and eat them all day and do nothing else, and not get fat. 

Tokyo has a reputation for being the best food city in the world, and all my students who want to become chefs (and there are quite a few) go abroad to become apprentices to masters.  No Japan blog is complete without praising the Japanese devotion to the culinary arts.  Every meal here is special.  Everyone is a great cook.  There is a constant search for new flavors and varieties, a constant appreciation for the range of the human stomach, from dolphin (which I have yet to eat) to sparrow (not so good, which is why it's always loaded with sauce) to pig uterus (which I was too drunk to remember) to raw horse (again, yet to partake) to fried scorpion (it's okay) to grasshopper (which is seriously, seriously delicious.  And, as a side note, the Japanese eat grasshopper, though rarely.  What's with the Biblical plagues, then?  If locusts come and detroy the crops, why couldn't they just harvest the locusts and eat them?).

Plates and sample sizes are small to reflect an appreciation for quality over quantity.  Television programming is overwhelmed by shows focusing on food.  Restaurants are everywhere.  Arrangement is as important as taste.  It's all delicious, and the best, most cosmopolitan American restaurants seem boorish in comparison to any ramshackle, backwoods family-owned establishment in Japan.  When I leave Japan, I think I'll miss the food more than anything else.

Comments

[translation]

ain't senbei rice crackers?? rice cake would be somethnig like mochi.

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